Half-Sized Human

A Half-Sized Human invaded my home. Mandy calls him Tim and says he is Sam’s little brother. He arrived yesterday with his parents while I was napping. They brought in luggage, so I assume they will stay a while. Elway was brave enough venture out of the confines of our bedroom for dinner, so he ate--but I was not brave enough. I came to the edge of the bedroom and allowed the visitors to gaze upon my beauty. They seemed appreciative of my handsome stature, so I might learn to like these people.

This morning when I came out for breakfast, the half-sized one was already up. He is noisy and quick, but he likes to admire my beauty. He really wants to pet me, which is forbidden, but I might allow him if he continues to offer his breakfast milk.

I have good news! Red Lightening Bug is well again! He is big and bright and I can chase him all over the house again. I watched Mandy perform surgery on his home, and then he flew out in full force again! What good news!

It’s raining again! I was hoping for some sunshine this morning, but alas, there is only hot, wet, smelly liquid falling from the sky.

Peyton

Dark Monday Morning

It is dark outside. Breakfast has come and gone, Sam is at work, and Mandy has already had her smelly brown drink, but it is still dark outside. In fact, I think it is darker now than when we got up this morning. The darkness is all brought on by the presence of rain. Meow. Hot, smelly liquid falling from the sky while bright light flashes—Gross. It makes all my hair stand up. What a way to start a day.

Dinner was tardy again last night. Mandy woke me from my nap by dragging me outside to see some non-existent frog. When I finally came back into the cool house, I had to bath because of the extreme heat outside. Mandy and Sam ate when they returned home, and Mandy shared some of her dinner with me, so I am not furious at our late dinner.

Red Lightening Bug is ailing; his light is fading. We have clapped and cried, trying to bring Bug back to life, but Mandy says he will be strong again soon. Bug likes to climb the fireplace—tempting us to jump. Mandy says my jumping is improving and I am learning how to scale greater heights.

Bug is back! I am off to play.
Peyton

Car Ride!

Today was abnormal to say the very least. Mandy and Sam started the day with their normal routine, but then suddenly--Meow!--things change! Sam is outside working and Mandy has that tiny scoundrel out on the stairs. She dug lots of cat hair from the carpet and then allowed that loud louse to crawl up and down the stairs.

Then this evening, I thought Mandy was going to feed us dinner and suddenly I’m being forced into my harness and dragged to the car. Sam tried to put the harness on, but he tangled it all up. Mandy had to put the nasty thing on me, and then forced both Peyton and I in the car. We went for a short ride, and then Sam jumped out of the car. Peyton and I explored his seat while he was gone. There are strange peddles by his feet and when the car is moving we’re not allowed to be near them. Mandy makes us stay in her lap or in the back of the car. Whenever the car is stopped we like to check out the forbidden peddles.

When Sam came back to the car he had this yummy smelling box, and he took us home. As soon as we were in the house we demanded that Mandy feed us. She did. Dinner was late, but the car ride was exciting. Peyton has less than favorable opinions about being dragged out of the house. I’m sure you can imagine his reaction. He’s still pouting and feuding in the other room.

Well, it’s getting late, and I want Mandy and Sam to go to bed soon.
Elway

Busy Hands

Strange things are happening around my house, and I’m starting to wonder what is going on. Mandy has been working more than normal doing odd jobs around the house. Yesterday she went outside and used this awful sounding machine to hack away at the bushes. She sent bugs, sticks and leaves flying into the air and they swirled all around her. When she came in, she smelled of the outdoors and she was covered in dirt. I’m unsure what Sam and Mandy have been doing outside, but they’ve been spending a lot of time out there. When Sam came home, they spent more time out there! It’s so hot out there! I wouldn’t want to be out there, and they are spending hours out there.

Red Lightening Bug is getting sick—that’s the only explanation. He is getting so small, and sometimes he flickers in and out. Mandy says not to worry about Bug, but I am concerned. I am trying to be gentle when we play. It's more fun to play when he's large and bright.

Well, I am going to go sit in my window for a while before the sun heats it up.
Elway

Unbelievable

I can’t believe Peyton’s behavior in writing out such a tirade yesterday. He can be so dramatic. If I let him blog today he’d grip about how late dinner was yesterday, but in reality it was right on time; it was just dark outside because of the storm.

Mandy played with us again yesterday morning but Peyton was too busy pouting to enjoy play time. Later in the day, while Peyton was sulking in the other room, I was helping Mandy around the house. She always cleans the clothes and bedding on Monday. One of my favorite things to help Mandy do is make the bed up. It’s always fun to force the sheets into submissive shapes and chase out the air so the material is flat against the bed. Mandy says I’m a big help! I do it for selfish reasons. She always makes the bed as soon as the sheets come out of Dryer. They are nice and warm and smell so good!

The Red Lightening Bug has been fluttering around the house and I have been trying to discover ways of catching him. He’s very smart though—and fast! He can land on my paw and then just as I pounce, he’s already landed on top of my paw again! Last night he was crawling on my backside, and there was nothing I could do to get him off. What a tricky little creature. I’m sure having fun playing with him though.

I’m going to go sit in my window—it may be hot outside but at least it’s pretty!
Elway

General Complaints

Ok folks, there are some generals rules we have set up in this house hold that are not hard to follow. However, Mandy and Sam broke every single one of them this weekend! Elway and I had just slacked off on their training because we thought our people were all set in our ways and then this insubordination. We have ignored Mandy most all day, and only now am I venturing out of the safety of my reclusive garrison to place my general complaints against my spiteful treatment by my egotistical people.

Elway previously mentioned that Sam has been taking long weekends, and this weekend was no exception. It started off marvelously, but then Friday evening Mandy and Sam packed up and left just before dinner time. They did not feed us before they left. Dinner time is a set time in this household, and although Mandy has slowly been pushing it later and later, this breach of obedience is unacceptable. Elway assured me that it was a onetime occurrence in their forgetful minds. As soon as they returned home they feed us. Elway was too forgiving and pointed out that they were also eating dinner at the late hour. I was presumed upon to forgive this indiscretion, until the next evening when the same events took place again! Just before dinner time, Mandy and Sam left us only to return after our acceptable dinner hour and served us another late meal. Can you believe that it happened again on Sunday! Each time, they ate when they returned home, but the delay of our dinner three nights in a row is inexcusable.

I was never more pleased for a Monday to arrive. Hopefully tonight, our dinner will be served on time. If it is again late, I will be most displeased and will hereafter in force our household rules more vehemently.

With much disgust,
Peyton

Lights, Shrimp, Action!

The Lightning Bug is everywhere! There is no place that strange light cannot fly. Elway tries to eats the light and the bug allows him to think for a second or two that he actually succeeded. Then the Red Light flickers back to life, letting Elway know he failed to conquer his prey. I have ran all over the house, and jumped on walls trying to discover out how to slow that light down, but have been unsuccessful.

Mandy has been busy the last few days. She has been washing some windows and cleaning out some cupboards. The windows look very nice and I can now see clearly through the clean ones again. A man came to the house yesterday and worked on the noise maker. It was awful! He carefully played each note and then would change how the note sounded. Some of the changes were minimal, but others were awful! After he finished torturing the noise maker, he played some of the most beautiful music. I always enjoy listening to Mandy on the noise maker, but this guy could really play!

We had shrimp for dinner this week! Elway normally reports about shrimp immediately, but he has been pouting since the Shrimp Dinner. Mandy shared her shrimp with me too, and Elway thought I was interfering with his dinner. Mandy says we have to enjoy the shrimp while we can because the oil spill is still a mess, and they still have not cleaned up the disaster! Unacceptable! She says the oil is still flowing into the water and that fishing is being stopped in our area. What we will do if we cannot eat Shrimp and Fish?! What a catastrophe! People, clean up your mess! Please?

Sam has had long weekends lately and I am enjoying our summer schedule. Mandy and Sam normally play all day on Friday and then work most of the day on Saturday. As I watch them now, both relaxing on the couch, I believe this weekend will be no exception. They both have books and look like they will spend the day lazily. Although, I can tell by the way Mandy keeps glancing around that she is hoping to do something. It will be interesting to see how they entertain themselves. Last night, Mandy opened up Vacuums lair and asked Sam to get down a small box off the shelf. They sat down on the floor and proceeded to throw small white cubes with black dots around. They would stare at the small boxes only to pick up a few and toss them around again. At one point, Mandy yelled Yahtzee! Elway and I watched and watched and even tried to help Mandy by batting the boxes around, but Mandy said she did not need our help. What strange things these people do to entertain themselves. Perhaps they need a Red Lightning Bug too.
Peyton

Red Lightning Bug!!!

It has been a few days since my last report, and I have much to report. Mandy forgot to feed me dinner Saturday night. It was the first time in my entire life that Mandy seemingly forgot to feed us. My tummy was growling so loudly that I thought Mandy would hear, but she didn’t. So I jumped in her lap and loved her and loved her. Eventually she figured out what I wanted and she felt awful. Well, she should. I might have starved to death. Dinner was almost two hours late!

But the most exciting news is a new Red Lightning Bug that is flashing all over the house. We are trying to protect Mandy from this bug, because it will crawl on her leg, but she can’t catch it either. We have run all over this house, up the stairs, flying across furniture, on tables we aren’t allowed on, all trying to catch this annoying little fire fly. I have run more in the last 24 hours since this bug arrived than I did as a kitten. I have tried every trick in the book to catch this bug, but I have been unable to catch this nasty little creature. He lands on my paws, but I can't feel him, and when I try to pounce on him, he just goes right through my paws. He even taunts Peyton and me by dodging in and out from Vacuum’s lair. Last night after Mandy and Sam had gone to bed, the Red Lightning Bug flashed across the ceiling of the bedroom.

I have put my quest to over throw Vacuum on hold, again, mainly because I have to come up with new ways of usurping his authority. I will find a way.

The Red Bug is back again! I have to go!!!
Elway

Vacuum the Villain

That awful Villain has been snorting through my house, and the mini-monster has been moseying around too. Baby Vacuum came out first and snorted all over the couches. I had to roll around on my cat couch to make it smell like me again after that baby went back into hiding. Then not long after when I thought life was returning to normal, Mandy pulls out the Evil Villain. I’ve said it before, but let me say it again—I loathe Vacuum! So, when I heard his monstrous wheels on the floor, I made a bee-line for the bed. I have a hiding space inside the bed and it seems to be the only safe place when the Pig is feeding.

I have thought of many ways of showing Vacuum my fierce strength—my cunning skills should be feared throughout all the land—however, I can’t scare that Scoundrel away. I’ve tried playing with my mice right outside the Villain’s Lair, but he only steals them away. I have tried a sneak attack from under the door, but he is always out of reach. I have chased bugs in there, but he only eats them. I am not succeeding in chasing away the Scalawag. I would like a new tactical plan, but I think I need some help. How can I run this Villains Vacuum from my home once and for all? Any and all ideas would be welcome.
Elway

A Big Day for Sam

Apparently today is a big day for Sam because Mandy made him a special breakfast that did not include milk in a bowl for the kitties. Meow. She baked it in the oven and while it smelled good, she did not bother to share any with me. She said it was Sam’s special birthday breakfast. So, Happy Birthday Sam, even if you did have any milk to share with us kitties.

It has been so hot lately! My fur feels kind of strange after being in the heat. Mandy says I don’t have to go outside unless I want. Peyton feels cleaner than I do, and he spends more time outside! He actually likes the heat and goes out gladly. I will have to give myself a good bath today in order to clean my fur.

I have been snuggling Mandy at night while she sleeps. It is nice to sleep on the soft bed, and when Sam wakes up he always loves me. Sometimes I can even talk him into giving me some extra crunchies, but I have to be really pathetic to get them. It is so hard to be so pathetic and I rarely get extra crunchies.

Peyton has been sleeping next to the fire place because the tile is a little cooler than the carpet. It is so hot that I can’t blame him for taking the coolest place in the house to nap. I kind of wish I had thought to stake my claim first.

Well, it’s time to go play now.
Elway

Eh, Monday.

When Sam went to work this morning, a large garden spider blew in the front door. Mandy hates spiders, so I had to take care of this large intruder so it would not bother her. However, Mandy saw me giving the spider a piece of my mind, and took matters into her own hands. Since the spider was already injured, she grabbed baby vacuum and sucked up the spider. I was glad that I didn’t have to finish off the spider, but did Mandy really have to grab the mini villain? I'm sure there are other ways Mandy could have taken care of the intruder.

This weekend was hot. HOT! Mandy and Sam splashed around in the big tub and made a huge mess outside. They did something they've never done before—they climbed out of the big tub, only to run and jump back in seconds later. They splashed water everywhere! Peyton and I were so tired of water flying everywhere, we cried and cried. Mandy just ignored us, so Peyton opened the door and let us in the house without their help.

Last night, Sam forced Peyton and me outside to play. It was hot out there, but I decided if I was going to be forced outside against my will, I would stay out there until Mandy or Sam invited me. Peyton went in and out several times, while I stayed outside and refused their offer to come inside. Eventually Mandy came outside and brought me back in the house. I appreciated her personal invitation to come back in, and I expressed my gratitude to her.

Well, I am going to go sit in the window. It is still shady so I want to enjoy it before the sun comes in and it heats up the window.

Elway

Big Day

Mandy and Sam say that today is a big day, but I am curious as to why it is such a big deal. First of all, it’s raining. A lot. As I was watching the rain this morning, Mandy said to me that it was raining cats and dogs. I jerked my head around to see outside, but I didn’t see cats or dogs anywhere! I don’t know why she would say it was raining animals. Strange statement. Mandy says that it doesn’t matter if it is raining because it is still an important day. Today is Mandy and Sam’s anniversary—they’ve been married five years. That’s a long time! I haven’t been alive half that time.

Yesterday Mandy tossed me outside. I was humiliated. Why would Mandy throw me outside when I didn’t want to go? She made Peyton go outside too, but he seemed content to play outside. As soon as she offered, I came back inside. She said it was good for us to play outside a little, even it was hot. I guess it wasn’t so bad, because it was fun to play outside-even if it was hot.

Well, I guess it’s time to ask for more crunchies.
Elway

Holiday Weekend!

The long weekend was super! Peyton and I were able to play all over the house while Mandy and Sam relaxed and worked. They left at one point and came back covered in sand, and they sure smelled bad. They also worked in the house organizing and cleaning. I feel like they do that a lot, but they always have things to do. For example, Mandy has already started working this morning in the kitchen and the bedroom.

Superman Sam was all over the place this weekend! He saved several animals! First of all there was a huge turtle in front of our house and I watched as a car drove by and hit the turtle! When Superman Sam came home he picked up the turtle and moved him out of the road. We are not sure what happened to the big turtle because he hid after Sam moved him. But hopefully he will be safe. Superman Sam also found a frog in the big tub! He reached in with his bare hands and scooped the frog out and set him free outside the screen. Mandy also found a tiny frog out front that Superman Sam saved from being thrown away when he got in the leaves Mandy was trying to pick up. The most important rescue this weekend was the rescue of my mice! Shrimp Dad gave us three mice at Christmas and we had lost two mice to Vacuum! The Villain took the mice and hid them in his evil lair. Sam found them this weekend and freed them from their Evil Captor.

Yesterday, Mandy worked in the dirt pulling what she calls weeds. It never ceases to amaze me how many weeds she will find. When Mandy finished out front she took me outback and then all of a sudden this machine started making this awful sound! The machine was eating the grass and Sam was pushing it through the backyard. I was so terrified that I cried and Mandy let me come back inside. When Sam was finished Mandy took Peyton out front and he watched Sam sweep up leaves. Peyton said he was also frightened, and Mandy brought him back inside. She said we are fraidy cats and that we were safe. I guess we’ll never know who was right.

Today Peyton and I want to go outside, but we can’t because Mandy says the ground is wet. I just heard thunder! I think I will go snuggle Mandy because she will keep me safe.
Elway